Many of the people who come to see me for solution focused coaching already have a good understanding of whatever their issue is. For example, few of my weight control clients don’t know which foods are healthy and which aren’t, and all my quit smoking clients know the health risks of continuing with the habit.
However, my anxiety clients are different. They often don’t understand the physical or psychological processes they’re suffering from. It’s therefore an important part of my job as a coach to explain the steps in the stress process (see below).
I provide this explanation at the commencement of our work together, because this knowledge then establishes a firm platform from which the person can begin to build the skills and habits needed to effectively manage their excessive anxiety in future.
I spend as much time as is needed explaining each step in the stress process and where anxiety fits in. Perhaps more importantly I point out some of the tools and techniques available that enable us to intervene at each step in the process.
Because we’re all unique a particular tool or technique is unlikely to work for everyone. Fortunately, I have over 250 tools and techniques in my anxiety/stress toolbox so I’m never short of options to present to my clients.
Simply by building an awareness of how we create anxiety and it’s impact on us, we can begin to make progress towards a healthier, happier life. For instance when a person understands that the physical response they experience when thinking about giving a presentation at work is the same as meeting an armed man on a dark night, and that running away is what their body wants them to do, then she/he can begin to understand why they feel so bad.
Zen Buddhists refer to the constant chatter of the mind as "Monkey Mind". The Buddha held that the human mind is filled with drunken monkeys flinging themselves from tree branches, jumping around, and chattering nonstop. He meant that our minds are in constant motion creating automatic thoughts, conscious thoughts and internal dialogue.
We all get unhelpful "monkey mind" from time to time - where our brain roams out of control - swinging from one thing to the next. Sometimes it's exciting: plans we're making, ideas we have. Other times it can be a long catalogue of things to remember, worries and 'shoulds'. Often it's a mix of both. Of course the worst time to have 'monkey mind' is when we're trying to go to sleep.
This super simple tool calms that 'monkey mind' so you can get the sleep you deserve! I encourage you to use the tool this week and let me know just how effective you found it. You can download it here: Monkey Mind Brain Calmer Tool.
To find out more about how you can overcome anxiety and reduce stress, simply invest in a no obligation complimentary 30 minute consultation. It could be life changing.
Tony Yuile is hired by people seeking help to perform at their best in one or more areas of their lives. He's a personal performance coach & hypnosis professional based in Wellington NZ, where he specialises in helping people perform under pressure, reduce anxiety and manage stress. Tony’s solution focused approach to coaching uses a range of techniques drawn from the fields of co-active coaching, hypnosis, positive psychology and neuro-linguistic programming (NLP).
Contact Tony today to discuss how he can help you, or if you think Tony could help someone you know, you might like to encourage them to get in touch with him.
This article contains the personal views and opinions of the author, which may change over time. It is intended to be for information only and does not constitute medical advice. For medical and health advice, always consult a qualified medical professional.