I’ve been coaching for a number of years now and I’ve met a lot of people who’ve told me, “I’m an anxious person. I always have been. I probably always will be. Nothing helps,” or something similar.

My response usually goes something like this: “You are NOT your anxiety, because anxiety is a feeling. It’s something you experience. I agree that it can seem like anxiety is part of your identity, who you are, but it’s not. It’s an uncomfortable, often painful, feeling you’ve been living with. That feeling has been controlling your life, but now it’s time to take back control, and believe me, you have the power to do that. And I’m going to show you how.”

Often this response is, at first, met with disbelief, because many people don’t believe that their anxiety can be resolved quickly. They’ve been led to believe that to overcome anxiety requires months, if not years, in therapy or counselling. But with the right strategy it’s possible to create rapid change. Fiona one of my clients experienced just that:

Hi Tony, I haven’t been back for my second session because I’m doing so well! I’ve experienced the least anxiety in the past month-6 weeks that I’ve felt in five years.” ~ Fiona

A key part of my anxiety busting strategy is to explain to the anxious person (using the STRESS Process model) how we create the feeling of anxiety. With this understanding things become a lot clearer. It becomes clear that anxiety is NOT part of a person’s identity, it’s actually the end result of a normal, natural mind/body process.

Once a person has this understanding, I point out all the steps in the STRESS Process they can actively intervene, in order to control the amount of anxiety they experience now, and in the future (if any). This is information is empowering. People go from feeling they have no control over their anxiety to feeling a real sense of control.

The fact is, with the right knowledge, tools and techniques combined with the right level of commitment, motivation and practice, you can rapidly change your mind, your feelings and your anxious behaviours. That means you don’t have to experience unnecessary anxiety for longer than you have to.

Necessary vs unnecessary anxiety

Not all anxiety is unnecessary. Anxiety is a a key part of our survival system. It’s a signal from our unconscious to our conscious mind that something important to us is in danger or at risk of harm. The signal focuses our attention on the threat and motivates us to take action to prepare to deal with it. However, when we experience anxiety, and there is no real threat to our well-being then the anxiety is serving no purpose, and is an unnecessary feeling. It hinders rather than helps us.

Are you ready to say ‘goodbye’ to your unnecessary anxiety?

If you’re committed to finding a solution for your anxiety contact me on 021 056 8389 for a free, 30 minute phone/skype consultation to discover what’s possible.

Alternatively why not come along to one of my February workshops – “Say ‘Goodbye’ to your anxiety and stress.”

Over the course of five hours I’ll be sharing some of my favourite and most effective, simple, easy-to-learn, anxiety busting strategies and techniques. These are the techniques I use on a daily basis in my coaching practice that deliver life changing results for my anxious and stressed clients. To learn more details about this workshop and secure your place, visit – EVENTBRITE. Places are limited – so take action today to secure your seat! I look forward to meeting you.

Go well


REMEMBER – “When you change your mind you change your life.”

Tony Yuile is on a mission to help people enjoy lives free of unnecessary stress and anxiety. If you’d like his help, or you know someone who would benefit, give Tony a confidential call/text today on 021 056 8389 or email tony@tycoaching.nz